Trump furious that Biden’s FBI sniffed Melania’s Les Wexner underwear

But is it all one big reality show?

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News reports a few days ago conjured up images of Trump blowing a gasket at the thought that Biden’s FBI went pawing through Melania’s closet, sniffing and trying on various high-end undergarments gifted by such friends as Jeffrey Epstein and Les Wexner, billionaire founder of Victoria’s Secret and Epstein’s Mossad Mega Group sugar daddy. Which raises the question: Is this all one big reality show?

That’s what False Flag Weekly News commentator Helen Buyniski (a.k.a. Helen of Destroy) seems to think:

“It’s ridiculous. Again, they’re showing their desperation. I guess they want to get Trump back in office because it would relieve them of the need to be held responsible for the collapse of the United States. They’re not really enjoying being held responsible for 20% inflation, record gas prices, and the collapse of society. I don’t think the US is going to last through another presidential term. I’d be surprised if it makes it to the election. But if it does, they might want to get their hands off the steering wheel for awhile.”

David Brooks of The New York Times, normally not a fan of conspiracy theories, seemingly agrees. His first reaction to the raid was: “Did the FBI Just Re-elect Donald Trump?”

Brooks could hardly believe how perfectly timed the FBI raid was to revive Trump’s sagging political fortunes:

At least for now, the search has shaken the Republican political landscape. Several weeks ago, about half of Republican voters were ready to move on from Trump, according to a New York Times/Siena College poll. This week (after the FBI raid -KB) the entire party seemed to rally behind him. Republican strategists advising Trump’s potential primary opponents had reason to be despondent. “Completely handed him a lifeline,” one such strategist told Politico. “Unbelievable … It put everybody in the wagon for Trump again. It’s just taken the wind out of everybody’s sails.”

If there really were a Deep State conspiracy to re-elect Trump, the purpose probably wouldn’t be limited to insulating the Democrats from blame for the collapse of the United States. More likely, the neocon-infested Deep State, which largely controls both major parties, would make Trump a deal he couldn’t refuse: “Go along with our hyper-bellicose foreign policy, which will very likely lead to World War III, and we’ll let you be a Wartime President with dictatorial powers far beyond the wildest dreams of Abraham Lincoln, Woodrow Wilson, and Franklin D. Roosevelt combined. So…if you really want to be the American Hitler, here’s your chance.”

Installing a militarist, chest-thumping, let’s-conquer-the-world New Trump (sort of like the 1968 New Nixon i.e. “nuke-’em-Nixon”) in the White House just in time for World War III would solve the Deep State’s biggest problem: getting conservative Americans, the backbone of the military and militarism in general, back on board for war. As it stands today, if Joe Biden ordered the nation to march off to World War III—which would require a total national mobilization entailing considerable sacrifices, quite likely including the sacrifice of tens of millions of American lives—a plurality of conservatives would be inclined to tell Joe to go to hell.

The war propagandists of The New York Times call America’s leading antiwar political force “The GOP’s Putin Wing.” Call them what you want, they represent the large majority of conservatives who are in no hurry to die to make the world safe for LGBTQ and preschool gender reassignment surgery without parental consent. These folks, the backbone of the American heartland and the primary cannon fodder for American wars, are on Putin’s side, not Biden’s, in the culture wars. Absent their enthusiastic consent, World War III is a non-starter.

So how could they be rehabilitated? What could get conservatives snappily saluting the flag and responding “yes SIR” to orders to kill Russians and Chinese and Muslims and whoever else? The obvious answer: a Trump dictatorship. If Trump returns to the Oval Office, presumably after a hard-fought battle against the nasty, decadent Democrats, the majority of conservatives will goose-step in whichever direction he orders them.

The main obstacle to any such plan is Trump himself. There is no evidence that Trump really wants to lead America into a yuuuuuuge war. On the contrary, all evidence suggests that Trump repeatedly clashed with the pro-war faction of the Deep State during his four years in office. Rather than demonizing Putin and Xi and Kim, Trump wants to rub shoulders with them and brag about being their best bud. And when you get right down to it, Trump’s MAGA agenda, which contemplates pulling the US out of what George Washington called “entangling alliances” (like NATO), isn’t all that different from the Putin-Xi-Khamenei vision of a post-US-Empire multipolar order of fully sovereign nations.

So if the neocons and neolibs and exceptionalists want to use Trump to conquer the world for the banksters’ Anglo-Zionist Empire, they are going to have to reprogram him. I can think of two ways they might do that.

First, they could try to convince him that he’s the Messiah. That might not be too hard.

Washington Post columnist Dana Milbank notes that Trump

“tweeted out with approval a conspiracy theorist’s claim that Israelis view Trump ‘like he’s the King of Israel’ and ‘the second coming of God’ (a theology Jews reject). He shared the conspiracy theorist’s puzzlement that American Jews don’t view him likewise.”

If Trump were the Jewish messiah, he would have to be a military leader who conquers the world. (Jews reject the Christian and Muslim claim that Jesus a.k.a. the Prince of Peace is the only true messiah; instead, they are awaiting a militarist messiah who will defeat and permanently subjugate the goyim.) To convince Trump that such is his destiny, a Deep State operative might dose the ex-president’s Diet Coke with scopolamine and have Jared Kushner and/or his Chabad buddies whisper sweet messianic nothings into Trump’s wide-open ear.

If that didn’t work, a foolproof fallback plan would be to swap Trump out with a look-alike, sort of like Jim Fetzer thinks happened to Paul McCartney in 1966 (and Joe Biden in 2020). But since there aren’t a whole lot of 76-year-olds who look and talk like Trump and can down a dozen diet cokes a day (just as there weren’t a whole lot of super-talented left-handed bass players in 1966 who looked and sang exactly like Paul McCartney, for Jim Fetzer’s information) the best option might be for the Deep State to hire the Walt Disney Company engineers who built the Hall of Presidents, and have them construct a programmable Donald Trump Android. After all, an obedient android antichrist messiah connected to a supercomputer in the bowels of Langley or Tel Aviv or wherever might be a good way for the Deep State to proffer a cooperative front-man, or rather front-robot, to shill for their one-world government.

Sounds crazy? Maybe. But the way the world’s going,* it’s getting harder to distinguish actual news from conspiracy ravings and sci-fi fantasy. Discerning what’s real from what’s not may soon become well-nigh impossible. Until that happens, we’ll keep on discerning, as best we can, at False Flag Weekly News.

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*This past week’s leading example of sci-fi craziness passing as news, or vice-versa, was the revelation that the US Congress has officially declared that at least some UFOs are “not man-made.” That isn’t quite the proverbial ET landing on the White House lawn, but it’s getting close. Since UFO disclosure advocates assert that the 80-year coverup was in part driven by an attempt to protect religious sensibilities from the shocking news that other planets and dimensions are inhabited by advanced beings, I thought this might be an appropriate moment to bring back my 2008 interview with two experts on what Islam has to say on the subject: