COVID Idiots Now Turned Ukraine Idiots

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How did the COVID idiots transform overnight into Ukraine idiots? If I were a crazy conspiracy theorist I would wonder whether those American bioweapons labs in Ukraine came up with a new COVID variant, genetically tailored to affect Western liberals, that infected susceptible brains with virulent Russophobia.

But that’s a pretty goofy theory, even compared to some of the stuff I hear from my friends. (“Watch the water,” anyone?) For a much more plausible psychological diagnosis, check out The Psychology of Totalitarianism by Matthias Desmet. He argues that “mass formation,” a a sort of totalitarian mind-virus, can rapidly affect societies racked by loneliness and isolation, meaninglessness, and free-floating anxiety, frustration, and aggression.

Fortunately I found a cure for the Mass Formation disease, and it doesn’t involve needles full of experimental genetic substances, face diapers, or putting the entire population under house arrest. Find out what it is by watching today’s khutba (Islamic sermon):

Speaking of free-floating anxiety, we’ve all been worried about Gonzalo Lira, who disappeared for a week in Kharkiv, Ukraine. Today he turned up alive, wal-hamdullilah. So we’ll have to downgrade the charges against the Daily Beast from “murder” to “attempted murder.”

Since good news is so rare in today’s world, I think I’ll just stop there and let the free-floating anxiety dissipate.